Day 120 - April 30, 2010

Things just are, and fussing don't bring changes. - Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt

Today, if life deals me a bad hand, I won't waste time whining about my rotten luck. I'll just fold 'em and say "Deal 'em again."

First of all, it's May 1. I know sometimes I don't post blogs on time, but that's not because I don't write them. I will read the day and actually write the blog down in a notebook or something, so even if they aren't posted on time, they're written. But today, just now, actually.. I realized that I'd forgotten last night. I don't know how, because I've done it for 119 days straight without forgetting. I guess my life has been sort of crazy lately, with finals and .. such. "Such" taking up most of my thoughts.. So I was studying til past 2am, and I had a visitor around 1am-ish. And I've just had a lot to think about.

Actually, the poker metaphor for today (yesterday, I mean) is really appropriate for my life.

I was recently .. dealt a hand that was somewhat surprising, somewhat expected/overdue.. And I didn't really know what to do with it. It wasn't a bad hand, not at all. Just a .. wild card, if you will. I still don't really know what to do with it, and as of today, it looks like I'll have the summer to think about it, or not think about it, as the case may be.

The hand shifted last night.. I guess I traded cards or something, because the hand got .. I don't want to say worse, but it didn't get better and it didn't stay the same. (This metaphor is getting difficult.) I'm slightly disappointed about it, but I'm not going to waste time whining about it. Today is my day to be slightly upset about it, and then I won't complain. Because if it's supposed to work out.. It will. I'm pretty confident about that.

And I don't know how the rest of the game is gonna go. I could go all in.. And win.